Mom's "Spidey Senses" Tingling

I just had one of those moments where, as a parent, you make a choice that goes against your mom instincts. Eric, the sixteen year old Sophomore, has a tennis match this afternoon. I seem to be the designated team driver, since most of the moms work full time and our school does not have a school bus. Today's match, an away game, is at Roosevelt High School located in one of the rougher parts of town. Normally, I stay to watch Eric's matches but today's schedule prohibits that since Adam needs me to take him to a clarinet lesson. Dad is slated to be the Hendey family cheering section for the afternoon, so Eric won't be without support.

We've played Roosevelt and other teams in that section of town in the past and I've never thought twice about Eric's personal security. But last week, Roosevelt was the site of a student shooting where an on-campus police officer was personally attacked and subsequently shot and killed the student. This happened about a week ago, and our community is still in mourning. The teen involved had a history of mental illness and there are inferences by the police that this was "suicide by cop". Regardless of the circumstances, a life was lost as countless students were watching and a lockdown ensued. Surely, this is something these young teens will remember for the rest of their lives.

I remember hearing about the shooting during a telephone conversation with an associate who lives across the country. She said, "Do you know anything about the high school shooting in Fresno?" Since that was the first I'd heard of the event, I immediately hopped over to CNN and checked out the details. Roosevelt High is only a few miles away from Eric's school, yet I remember feeling a sick sense of relief when I saw that the events hadn't taken place at my kids' school. Not that I wished that horror on the families of Roosevelt...I guess my relief (which now saddens me when I contemplate it) is a pretty normal motherly reaction. The events of that day continue to unfold, and my prayers for the family who lost their teen continue, as well as my prayers for the officer who had to make such a terrible decision in an effort to save his own life.

I don't know what the point of all of this is today, except to share my sense of malaise. I can recall watching two years climb to the top of a slide or five year olds taking off training wheels and having the same sense of maternal fear. In my mind, I know that Eric is in a safe place this afternoon and that the events of last week are an isolated incident, but in my heart I'm counting the moments until he and his teammates have completed their match and come home. Do you ever have these moments of motherly fear, and if so how do you cope? I'd love to hear your thoughts.

And in the mean time, please join me in praying for the repose of the soul of Jesus Carrizales, for healing (emotional and physical) for the officer involved, and for all of our children who face fear, violence and danger in today's world.