Joy Ride to Seal Beach

When I die, if I am lucky enough to get one big toe into heaven, I won't be at all surprised if I find out that God has an Irish accent.

What makes me say this? Well, this weekend I had the opportunity to spend some time with one of my most favorite people, my childhood pastor Fr. Michael Collins, on the occasion of his 88th birthday. If I had to choose the holiest person I know, Fr. Collins would win hands down. That's a fairly bold statement, since he's in a horse race with my parents, two saintly grandmothers and a whole bunch of Catholic School Teachers. What sets Father aside though is his attitude - the ability with which he lives a life that is at once reverent and filled with fun.

I've known Father Collins since before I can remember. The problem with having such a beloved priest growing up is that he's set a fairly unattainable benchmark for every other pastor I've known since I was five. None compare, and it's for this reason that I felt it necessary to make the nine hour round trip on Sunday to be in attendance at Father's birthday party.

I arrived in Seal Beach about ten minutes before the commencement of the noon Mass, which Father Collins was scheduled to celebrate. When I caught sight of him laying aside his walking cane and being helped into his vestments, my heart caught in my throat. Was this my burly Irish pastor, former rugby star and volleyball terror?! I haven't seen Father for a few years, so I was emotionally unprepared for the frailty I was witnessing.

However, as soon as Father opened his mouth to begin Mass, I breathed a sigh of relief. There was that voice, that lovely, lilting Irish brogue, voicing the opening prayer of the Mass in a style that took me back to my schoolgirl days. Father Collins doesn't "say" Mass - he celebrates it. For me, attending one of Father's masses never ceases to lift me up, to polish any dullness that may have accumulated on my spiritual life, to make me feel loved and cherished by my God.

There were a few physical changes in this great man. He delivered his homily and distributed the Eucharist from a seated position. I did note, to my amazement, that he took his glasses OFF to read - those 88 year old Irish eyes are still smiling! But the homily he delivered was, as always, filled with a wit and a perspective that smacked me right in the heart. Father Collins has always been able to succinctly relate the scripture to everyday life, complete with one liners that you won't soon forget. Sunday's most memorable line for me was Father's simple prayer, recently authored by him, in keeping with the theme of driving envy and jealousy from our hearts:

"Jesus and Mary, get this trash out of my mind, once and for all. Amen"

Delivered with an Irish accent, it seems like the perfect prescription for some of the mindgames I play with myself.

Following Mass, we had a wonderful party filled with countless FOF - Friends of Father! Those present ranged in age over several generations - wheelchair ridden widows, appreciative kids of baby boomers, and three year olds who still love to play with Father's pet pocket mouse "Oscar" just like I did when I was little. We had a sing-along to a few of Father's favorite Irish tunes, and my own personal favorite: Rise and Shine.

On the long ride home, I said a prayer of thanksgiving for this wonderful man, who introduced me to my faith long before I could know or appreciate it fully. His voice, the one that taught and nurtured in me a love for a God who will never leave me alone, is the voice I frequently hear in my head in my private conversations with God.

At Mass, we sang one of Father's favorite songs - it's even more perfect now as I watch Father enter his twilight years:

Just A Closer Walk With Thee

I am weak, but Thou art strong;
Jesus, keep me from all wrong;
I'll be satisfied as long
As I walk, let me walk close to Thee.

Just a closer walk with Thee,
Grant it, Jesus, is my plea,
Daily walking close to Thee,
Let it be, dear Lord, let it be.

Through this world of toil and snares,
If I falter, Lord, who cares?
Who with me my burden shares?
None but Thee, dear Lord, none but Thee.

Just a closer walk with Thee,
Grant it, Jesus, is my plea,
Daily walking close to Thee,
Let it be, dear Lord, let it be.

When my feeble life is o'er,
Time for me will be no more;
Guide me gently, safely o'er
To Thy kingdom shore, to Thy shore.

Just a closer walk with Thee,
Grant it, Jesus, is my plea,
Daily walking close to Thee,
Let it be, dear Lord, let it be.

Thank you Father, for inspiring me in my own walk with Jesus! I can't wait to celebrate your 89th!

Is there anything cuter...

than a one year old celebrating his birthday with a hunk of chocolate cake? I love you PIII - thanks for inviting me to your party! Auntie Lisa

Way to Go David!

My brother-in-law Dave is an incredible guy! Not only is he married to one of my best friends and the daddy of the world's cutest two year old, he's a man of many accomplishments. He's also the type of person who sets goals for himself. Unlike my goals, Dave's are substantive.

One of them is the feature of Chicago Tribune columnist Eric Zorn's feature column today! Dave and his friend Rich have been on a quest to spot every Chicago Cab between #1 - 100 and he's missing only one. Click here to read about Dave's quest.

Do you have a collection/obsession/quest? I'd love to hear about it!

Raising Great Kids

Cheryl Dickow, who is the author for June's CatholicMom.com Non Fiction Book Club Pick, has written to share the following information on a Parenting Seminar she will be presenting. I just wish I lived closer so I could attend!

Inspirational Workshop for Christian Parents, Grandparents and Care-Givers,

featuring Cheryl Dickow, author of “Raising Christian Children in a Secular World”*

Tuesdays, September26th, October 10th, and October 24th from 7-9 p.m.
Our Lady of the Lakes Parish Hall; 5481 Dixie Highway, Waterford, MI

$25.00 fee includes the three-part workshop, Cheryl’s book*, wonderful door prizes, refreshments, and a great opportunity to find the support you need as you raise your Christian children in our secular world!

For more information contact Jeanie Sharp at 248.623.0274 or Cheryl Dickow at Cheryl@AskKnockSeek.com or 248.917.3865 or visit www.AskKnockSeek.com

Dads - Needing help?

I know there are a few Daddys along with my own who frequent this space. None of the ones I know need "SuperNanny"!

But just in case you do, InteractiveDad.com has asked me to share with you the fact that she's recruiting. Click here for more information on how you can apply.

Lindenville's Relocated

My friend Cami's blog has moved to new digs. Click here to enjoy Cami's new format for the Lindenville Journal. You'll enjoy your visits - Cami never ceases to inspire!

Have You Been Stuck In Traffic In Chicago?

Remember my recent post about the banners promoting Fr. Jim Martin's My Life With the Saints book that can be seen from the Kennedy in Chicago?

I've been contacted by a reporter who's looking to interview someone who's seen the banners firsthand. If you've seen them, could you drop me an email to lisa@catholicmom.com or post a comment here. Thanks!

A Midsummer Night's Campout

Adam and I went camping last night.

Granted, it was in our own backyard. But if it involves Mom leaving her comfy waterbed and sleeping in a tent or Mom having to truck through dew-filled grass at 3 am to use the facilities, it's camping.

We started with s'mores at our outside fire ring. After fifteen minutes of being descended upon by mosquitoes, we realized we'd forgotten to put on bug spray. The great thing about camping in your own backyard is that if you forget something, you can just walk inside the house and find it.

Once we were coated in enough bug spray to scare off even the most persistent mosquitoes, the s'more cooking continued. Adam decided to cool off with a late night dip in the pool, and then it was time for bed. We snuggled into our two man tent, accompanied by five stuffed animals. I love the fact that they're still in the picture for my 11 year old! Through the "moonroof" of the tent, we could see a sky littered with stars. Adam insisted he heard a fox outside the tent - we have a little grey fox the boys have dubbed "chickenhound" who likes to climb our apricot tree and eat the fruit before we can get to it!

Prayertime included blessings for those who didn't join us on the camping trip - Eric, in his own room, and Daddy, who I'm sure was enjoying every square inch of the king sized bed!

Next thing I knew, it was morning. Adam slept in, but I headed back to civilization for my morning prayers and walk. We had such a great time we're talking about camping again tonight!

Getting Ready for Sunday

One of the most popular features over at CatholicMom.com is our weekly Gospel activities. I've just finished posting this week's stuff, so head over and check it out. Initially, we just had a weekly coloring page related to the Sunday gospel. Now, I'm happy to offer weekly word search and crossword puzzles, as well as the popular Mass Worksheet feature prepared by Elyse Wilson. For a few years now, these have been a popular part of my web site. I benefit greatly each week from studying Sunday's gospel in my preparation of these pages. By the time I've created the puzzles, come up with a coloring page, and formatted Elyse's worksheet, I've read the Gospel through several times. When I sit in Mass on Sunday morning, my heart reflects back to this preparation, and I hear the Gospel message with great joy and anticipation.

One of my favorite resources for preparing for Sunday's liturgy is the website of Dr. Marcellino D'Ambrosio, who always has a great message related to the Sunday gospel. If you're a podcast listener, you can take in his weekly message on Catholic Exchange's weekly show with John Morales.

I've also had some emails lately requesting recommendations for books for Children's Liturgy of the Word. You'll find my favorites listed here - scroll down the page a bit and you'll find them. Remember, if you purchase your books at Amazon or Catholic Company via my CatholicMom.com links, you make a small donation towards the upkeep of the site, which is greatly appreciated.

While it may seem as though Gospel activities are just for kids, I think they'd be very helpful to adults as well, especially Elyse's worksheets. Also, you can help spread the word by asking your parish to include a note about CatholicMom.com in your Sunday bulletin. I have no advertising budget, so my site grows with the help of the Holy Spirit and word of mouth from friends.

Finally, I'm playing with a CatholicMom.com Frappr Map. If you'd like to mark your spot go here - I'd love to see where some of our activities are being used.

Adam Drumming - Week 1

Adam, first week of drum lessons - note the stocking cap when it's 100 degrees outside!!!

Happy First Birthday Patrick!

Dear Baby Patrick,

It looks like today you've outgrown the name "Baby Patrick" and you'll now join the ranks of your big cousin, Patrick P. in being called "Little Patrick"....Happy Birthday Sweetie!!!

I wish I could hold you today as you celebrate your special day, but your cousins and I are looking forward to being with you this weekend. It hardly seems possible that it's been a whole year since you arrived to turn the world upside down for your Mommy, Daddy and Justin!

When I think of you, I can't help but burst into a big smile! I know I'm biased, but I'm pretty sure you're the cutest one year old I know! I love watching you play, eat, read with your Mommy or be bathed by your Daddy. Your sweet disposition amazes me - maybe you're just a really good boy when Auntie Lisa's around!

I know that in no time at all, you're going to be swinging a bat, hitting golf balls and playing cards just like your Daddy. I expect you to keep him on his toes! The future holds so many wonderful, joyful experiences for you Patrick. Please know that I will always be here for you and Justin, no matter how big or small the challenges you face in life. You are in my prayers daily - I hope your next year is filled with fun, smiles, not too many tumbles learning to walk, lots of new (and loud!) words as you learn to talk, and a few long nights of sleep for your Mommy and Daddy.

I love you sweetie! Have a wonderful day!
Auntie Lisa

A Boy From Lawrence

This weekend, I completed my book spotlight on a wonderful book called A Boy From Lawrence, featuring an amazing man named Eugene Connolly. Eugene's widow Sally worked to compile all of his writings into a book that is a loving testimony to a life well lived.

Click here to read my spotlight on this great book.

What Would You Say?

I received an email from a reader asking about my policy on PG13 movies. As discussed here in the past, in our family there is no viewing of PG13 movies unless they have been pre-screened by parents. In some instances, that means actually watching the movie before the kids do (i.e. waiting for it to come out on DVD and then letting them see it only once we've viewed it). In other instances, it means consulting trusted review sources such as those I have listed over at CatholicMom.com. This doesn't always make my children happy, especially when they are invited to see a movie with friends and have to decline due to Mom and Dad's rule.

Don't get me wrong, my kids have seen lots of movies that are PG13 - it's just that we, as parents, have determined that they are ok for the boys to view. My kids are almost 15 and almost 12...

The reader who wrote me was asking about how to handle this situation with her children who are substantially younger than mine. Her almost six year old is good friends with someone who gets to see lots of PG13s and he's wondering why he can't go see them as well.

I'd advise this reader to stick to her convictions. In my family, when my boys ask things like this, I tell them that I don't care what rules other families have, but that these are the rules in our family. I try to lovingly convey to them that their Dad and I are doing our best at what I consider to be our most important responsibility - the raising of two sons who will hopefully one day grow into two Godly and loving men. I share with them that I know their disappointment, but that the few rules we have exist because of our deep love for them. I also remind them, now that they are getting older, that choosing to live life a certain way may not always be fun and easy, but that it does signify the type of person you are trying to be. With Eric, who will enter high school in the fall, I remind him that the peer pressure he faces on topics like movies is nothing compared to what lies in his path ahead - pressure to smoke, to drink, to do drugs, and much more.

I don't have all of the answers on this topic - I only know how I've tried to handle this with my own boys. The PG13 rule doesn't make me popular with them, but hopefully someday when they have the same rule with their own children, they will remember me kindly. Why do I say this? Because I had a "No R movies" rule with my own parents before PG13 existed. I'm sure I thought it was dumb when I couldn't go see Saturday Night Fever with my friends, but now I'm thankful that my parents lovingly and consistently gave me this limit. It made my Mom the bad guy, and gave me an excuse for not seeing content I was emotionally unready to handle.

What would you say to the Mom of the 5 year old? I'd love it if you'd share your comments below or email me at lisa@catholicmom.com with your thoughts and ideas.

Joyful Noise

My ears are ringing, and it's not from the aftereffects of last night's fireworks.

It's official - I am the mother of a drummer.

Perhaps given his affinity for sticks, it's not surprising that Adam would decide to take up the drums. He had his first lesson Monday and has been busily practicing ever since. The new drum set has taken up residence in the Music Room in a spot of honor. Adam came home from the first lesson with a simple page of sheetmusic covered in handwritten rhythms - to me, it looked pretty unintelligible. I said, "Do you know what this means?" (Inferring, "Did you really learn to read notes after only one thirty minute lesson?")

"Sure Mom, do you want to hear it?"

Of course I did, and I've been listening to it ever since - it's getting faster and louder with every playing!

Husband and #1 son tell me that this basic drum rhythm is played behind lots of popular songs. They're thrilled with Adam's progress toward being the totally excellent drummer dude for the family band. I'm happy too, but have started to worry about some practical considerations such as hearing loss and neighborly relations.

I wonder if Phil Collins' mom ever stressed out about what the people across the street were thinking?

All in all, in his three day career as a drummer, Adam's made amazing progress - but most of all, he's having a blast! Lots of practice is a good thing when you're falling in love with your instrument. It's such a joy to watch my children learn new things, even if they are a bit loud...it's better than the sound of video games!

C'Mon, Get Happy!

OK, you can just start calling me "Shirley" (as in "Shirley Partridge"). Adam, Greg and I just returned from an outing to Patrick's Music, where our youngest family member was registered to take drum lessons.

In case you haven't been keeping track, this is great news for the family band. Greg (Dad/ER Doctor) plays a mean guitar. He has a standing gig on his acoustic at our 9:30 Mass, but also plays some great electric guitar stuff.

Greg's musical talent has been passed down to Eric, who plays guitar, bass, and saxophone. The two of them have a blast "jamming" together.

The mom of the house plays (or, rather, is trying to learn) fiddle. I have weekly lessons and am lucky enough to have men in my house who can play along with the songs I'm learning. It's surprising how good I sound when Greg or Eric are accompanying me - mostly because they play much louder than I do! My fiddle teacher is trying to teach me to play sitting down, but according to Nana I need to be able to dance and jig while playing, so I practice both standing and sitting. The only problem with this is that I could never dance, even when I wasn't playing a violin, so the dancing skills are in serious need of work!

Adam has become proficient this year on two instruments: the recorder and the ocarina. If you're in my house for any length of time at all, you'll be treated to a pretty mean version of the theme from "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly". Since we were in New York, Adam's been asking for lessons on a new instrument: the trumpet. His Dad and Brother have been trying to gently coax him into playing the drums instead. We wanted it to be Adam's decision though. So today, we took a trip to the music store where Eric and I have our weekly lessons. They graciously allowed Adam as much time and space as he needed to try both instruments, which helped to cement his decision: the drums. We'll see how it goes - I talked Greg out of buying a drum set today (I think he really wants one for himself!). Adam has his first lesson on Monday with a teacher who seems to be very nice.

You may have heard that a few months ago my formal dining room was officially turned into the family music room. It gets much more use than the dining room ever did! Looks like we may have to make room for a rhythm section in there soon!

Playing together is very fun. So far, I'm the weak link. The boys would much rather play Eagles tunes than Bluegrass, but they humor me. None of us may ever play outside of our home (with the exception of my Mass playing hubby), but the fun we are having with each other right now is just wonderful. I'm not sure how I will feel in a few weeks with the sound of drums crashing all the time, but I think I'll prefer that to the sound of video games!

And hey, there's always ear plugs...

Stuck in Traffic in Chicago???

Keep an eye out for banners promoting one of my favorite books for 2006, Fr. James Martin's My Life With the Saints

Here's the press release with the full scoop:

Expressway Banner Campaign Urges Chicago Drivers to “Use Their Common Saints”

As the summer travel season heats up, motorists on Chicago’s Kennedy Expressway can look to the saints for help handling their daily commutes, thanks to a new banner campaign by Loyola Press. “Use Your Common Saints” will feature messages from St. Jude, St. Anthony, Joan of Arc and St. Joseph, reminding drivers of the virtues of patience—and good humor.

Beginning on June 26, the Catholic publisher’s banners will greet eastbound drivers (toward the Loop), from the back of St. Stanislaus Kostka Church, which abuts the Kennedy at Evergreen Street (about 1300 North, between Division and North Ave.).

First up: “St. Jude knows an alternate route”; followed by

• “St. Joseph says construction takes patience” on July 10;

• “Joan of Arc says keep your cool” on July 24; and

• “St. Anthony offers roadside assistance” on August 7;

• “St. Ignatius encourages Mass transit” on August 21.

“People feel like they need a little help in life, so they call upon the saints,” says James Martin, S.J., a Jesuit priest and author of the Loyola Press book My Life with the Saints, a surprise bestseller that has sold 12,000 copies in three months. The tongue-in-cheek approach is in keeping with saintliness, he says: “The lives of the saints show that joy and laughter are sure signs of God’s presence. They encourage us to laugh at life.” Besides, he adds, “Nobody would pay attention to them if they were boring.”

The banners will feature the Internet address LoyolaBooks.com. Visitors to the site will be able to read an excerpt about one of the four saints from Fr. Martin’s book.

Fr. Martin is a popular author and media commentator on religion and spirituality.

The banners are just one way that the 94-year-old Chicago-based publisher fulfills its mission to build bridges between the two-thousand-year-old Catholic faith and today’s spiritual seekers. “Our goal is to nurture faith-filled lives,” says Joseph Durepos, Loyola Press Acquisitions Director. “Proclaiming these messages on the Kennedy drives home the idea that God is with us in all that we do, even when we are stuck in traffic.”

You can take a peek at the banners by clicking here. I'll be in Chicago for a visit in late July, so I'll get to see St. Joan of Arc's banner in person. What a great tool this is for spreading the word about our faith, our saints, and an awesome book! Let's just hope people don't try to check the site while they're driving!

Great Stuff Alert!

I've just finished updating the weekly columns over at CatholicMom.com and I can't believe the vast array of incredible writing I get to share through my web site.

Some day, I've love to go on the "Catholic Mom Victory Tour". I'd load up my VW bus with my laptop, my fiddle, my sleeping bag (and maybe a few boys, but not necessarily!)

I'd bop up to Northern California and visit Lisa Barker , where I'd probably laugh myself silly.

Then I'd head east to meet some of the incredible cyber friends in person who I've grown to love over the years.

I'd stop by Michigan and say hi to Heidi and her kids. While in the midwest I'd have to stop and see Susan and Marybeth.

I'd have coffee with Patrice and Pat in Massechussets.

It would be such a neat thing to meet these women in person - they enrich my life so greatly each week when they share the gift of their writing at CatholicMom.com. Whether it's making me laugh out loud, cry a tear of inspiration, or just know I'm not in it all alone, they never cease to uplift me.

Treat yourself to a cup of coffee and check out what's new at CatholicMom.com this week. And if you're willing to put up an crazy chick in a VW bus for a few days along the way, let me know....

Taking Charge!

I passed by the field of the sluggard, by the vineyard of the man without sense; And behold! it was all overgrown with thistles; its surface was covered with nettles, and its stone wall broken down. And as I gazed at it, I reflected; I saw and learned the lesson: A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the arms to rest-- Then will poverty come upon you like a highwayman, and want like an armed man. Proverbs 24:30-34

Greg and participate in a couples' Bible Study, and at the moment we are studying a book entitled Proverbs & Parables : God's Wisdom for Living .

The other night, we studied the Proverbs in Chapters 23 and 24, and were asked to indicate which proverb spoke most directly to our hearts at this time. If you pick up the good book and take a look, you'll find it overflowing with helpful two and three line insights. But for some reason, the proverb above is the one that really slammed me between the eyes this week.

It's so easy to let things get away from us, and to make excuses about it. "I'm too busy to balance the check book...to shop for fresh produce...to take my walk...to mop the kitchen floor...to pray the Rosary...(fill in the blank...)."

Maybe you don't do this, but I do - all the time! I end up with a sense of being overwhelmed because my good intentions don't translate into action so much of the time. And yes, I've got good excuses, but like the "sluggard" in that parable, even a little "rest" can lead to my field being overgrown by thistles!

So what's the answer? For me, it's about taking charge, making a plan, and then just doing it. The first part of my plan, of course, needs to be prayer and lots of it! From there, however, comes the part that sometimes trips me up: breaking the problem down into realistic, manageable and attainable steps. If I look only at the overall goal, it seems too insurmountable to even attempt. However, if I take the time upfront to set tiny "babysteps" (yes, I get those Flylady emails too), I'm pretty sure I can make some progress.

Case in point: my children's scrapbooks. OK, I'm choosing a low stress example here, but bear with me. If I try to take on the task of getting my kids' photo albums updated (since they were last touched in late February of the year 2000...) it could feel pretty impossible, especially if you look at some of the scrapbooks being created these days! But if I say to myself, "Spend fifteen minutes today and put together one page for one boy, alternating each day", suddenly it becomes a little more possible.

I just finished reading a "mommy lit" book where the main character hires a Life Coach. The Life Coach advises her to make a list of all of the things in her life with which she is either "Satisfied" or "Dissatisfied" and then to prioritize the list and tackle the items one by one. I think I could probably manage the making of this list myself, perhaps even without the aid of a Life Coach.

OK, these are just some general musings for the morning and now it's time to go drive Eric to the hospital for his volunteer job. If anyone's got tips for me, or just wants to commiserate, you know where to find me!

Via email from the lake

Via camera phone from the lake...

Via email from the lake

Via camera phone from the lake...

Happy Birthday to Me...

Well, it was actually a while ago, but Greg and I got around to picking out my gift yesterday. We've been discussing it for a while, so we just had to find time to go acquire it.

We live close to several lakes and one pretty calm river, so I've been interested in finding a way to get out on the water with the boys more frequently. When I was growing up, our family owned a motor home and a trusty ski boat named "St. Jude" who always ran reliably at least the first day of any ski trip. We grew up camping and skiing with friends several times a year. I have great memories of trips to Lake Havasu (the California side) where the most ambitious thing we did for a week was to wake up at the crack of dawn to catch the glassy water. After skiing from 6 to 8 am, we'd come back to camp and spend the rest of the day languishing next to the 105 degree lake water. From my memory, the adults would sit in chairs at the shore, partially submerged to keep cool in the 118 degree heat while the kids played in the water. Serving of adult beverages (mostly Lucky Lager, I think) started around ten in the morning. I'm pretty sure we rarely showered or brushed our teeth, and we usually had our run of the campground, which we shared with a band of wild burrows. As we got older, each of us brought friends, and the families of our friends began to join us. Sometimes at trips closer to our Orange County home (like Mission Bay in San Diego), our favorite priest would come out to say Saturday evening mass for the campers. It was incredible. One of my fondest camping trip memories was the year when I was a young teenager and my clothes were all sprayed by a skunk on the first night of the trip. I spent the rest of the week in my bathing suit and a good friend's practice football jersey...I'm sure I would have smelled better in the skunk clothes by week's end.

These are memories the Hendey boys won't experience. My husband's idea of camping is staying in a two star hotel. We have done some pretty minimal camping trips with the boys, but not many. But I can't miss the chance to take advantage of some fun afternoons out and around the lakes that are so close by. We had our fun pontoon boat outing earlier this week, and it was great.

What I really wanted for my birthday was a kayak - one of those swift little numbers that can whoosh down white water rapids or paddle along the coastline in Monterey near the seals. Well, that's not going to happen this year - we determined we should by a two person model (no boy is allowed to go paddling yet without a parent). The price and size made them impossible at this point. We did look at some cute and very sporty one person kayaks (they even had cupholders!). But alas, now is not the time for mom to go paddling off into the sunset on her own...those days will be here soon enough, I know.

So what we settled on is a thrifty inflatable model that can be used by two people at a time, and can be deflated and thrown in the back on the Volkswagen Bus for easy transport. She's been christened "Renown" - we're big Horatio Hornblower fans in our house and the Renown was Horatio's third ship, where he first served as a real Lieutenant.

Renown hit the pool yesterday, and she's headed off to Millerton today for a picnic lunch and some paddling. She's a far cry from St. Jude, but she'll do the trick for now!

Lake Life

Tuesday night we headed up to Bass Lake, about one hour from home, for Greg's annual residency program dinner and roast. Greg (on electric guitar) and Eric (on bass guitar) performed a musical montage of songs like "Angie", "Hotel California", "That's What I Like About You", and more with the words all changed to pay homage (and some abuse) to the graduating residents. It's such a fun tradition and it was great to see my men up there playing together. Adam took charge of making and holding up a "CLAP" sign at the end of each number, but no promptings were needed - there was full on dancing and standing ovations! My husband is so cool! Of course, he took his share of roasting from the residents too - they referred to him as "HendeyMan" with a cape and big "H" on his chest.

This photo was taken on my cell phone on the pontoon boat we rented for a few hours. We took the boys boating - yikes, for the first time ever and this is so close to home! They loved tubing behind the boat and both did great tricks. But Mom won the award for the most spectacular crash of the day - I got a bit cocky trying to ride on my knees and jump the wake! What fun!! I swallowed half of the lake, but it was worth the cold dip to have such a great day with my boys.

Life is indeed beautiful - what a perfect way to spend the first full day of summer.

New York Postscript - Seeing the Big Apple with Teens

I just had to share a few great tips for anyone traveling to New York City with teens. We had such a fabulous trip! Since this is our third year in a row to visit NYC in mid June, and since we've done most of the major "tourist" things recently, we saw a few new sites this trip. Here are a few of my favorites:

National Comedy Theater - Who would imagine that you could take your eleven and fourteen year old sons out to a comedy club in New York City on a Friday night?! Our boys love stand up and improv comedy, but finding "clean" comedians can be a huge chore. We found the perfect venue! Manhattan's National Comedy Theater offers clean, and incredibly funny, comedy shows on Friday and Saturday nights. It's team improv, kind of like a comedy contest! We attended the Friday night early show and bought our tickets right before the performance. At $15 per ticket, I would say it's a great value. Our boys sat in the front row and were very involved in the performance. (If you're shy, don't sit in the front row!). If you're looking to laugh yourself silly, give this place a try on your next visit to New York.

Ellen's Stardust Diner - We wandered in off the street on Sunday afternoon and had no idea what a great time we'd have. This great diner is half Broadway musical, half American Idol. You may have to wait a few moments to place your order while your waitress belts out a tune on the microphone, but the food's worth the delay! The meals were a bit pricey (about $12 per entree), but given the fact that you're basically being entertained the whole time you're eating, it's a great family experience. One waitress sang a love song to Adam in front of the whole restaurant, and I thought he was going to climb under the table! The whole staff had great voices and singing along is encouraged! Check it out!

Apple Store Fifth Avenue - I'm about to take the plunge, so I thought I'd stop by the Apple Store and take a look at the laptops. Wow, what a great place. They have tons of products all out and available to be played with. Dad got a new iPod Shuffle for Father's Day and I convinced myself that it's only a matter of time until I switch. We had to drag the boys out of the store - they were having so much fun looking around and checking out the Mac Books. Now my only decision is...black or white?

A lot is written about traveling with babies and younger children, but not much advice is given for meeting the special needs of adolescents and teens while traveling. It's a great joy to be seeing places like New York with our boys in this new and very fun phase of their lives. Do you have a favorite spot in NYC? I'd love to hear about it in the comments, or email me at lisa@catholicmom.com - I'm already planning next year's trip!

Happy Birthday Patrick!

Dear Patrick,

How does the old saying go..."Better Late than Never!"??? Well, believe it or not, this post is intentionally delayed. I needed to be home to get my hands on this adorable photo of you with our newest littlest Patrick.

I hope you had a wonderful birthday! Our days have always been tied together in my mind, as your birthday follows mine by one day - it must have been a good month for Mom and Dad!

On the occasion of your birthday, I thought I'd take a moment to say thank you and to let you know how much I love you. It's kind of surprising, given the fact that when I was fourteen I found you to be the most irritating person who ever walked the face of the planet! I think we've both evolved a bit since then...

I'm so proud to have you as my brother - you are a wonderful man in every sense of the word! As husband and father, your commitment to your family shines. I love watching you with Justin and Patrick! They are lucky to have you in their lives. I know you studied under the best, so it's no surprise that you'd be a great family man.

One of my favorite aspects of your personality is your sense of humor - you make me laugh out loud, which is always a great thing! We have some fun and pretty crazy memories, which I will not memorialize here (and which you may - or may not - remember!). The mere thought of you usually makes me smile - both out of a wonderful sense of shared past and out of an appreciation for the person you have become in the present.

It's so good to know that with our family spread all over the country, I have you within an easy drive...long live the California pod! Your present will be late too (you'll probably get it when your son gets his!) - but my love and best wishes are being sent your way today! Happy Birthday - you're the best!

Love,
Lisa

Happy Father's Day Daddy

Dear Daddy,

Happy Father's Day! I'm sorry I'm not with you this morning to bring you breakfast in bed, but be assured that you're the first person I thought of this morning when I woke up. I'm the world's luckiest girl, and a large part of that comes from being raised by the world's best father.

The life lessons you shared with each of us are too innumerable to list here, but I've tried to learn most of them well, and you continue to teach by your loving example. Each day, I try to follow you example of living life to its fullest with a positive and loving attitude. I love the attention you pay to detail, and the energy with which you work at bettering some part of yourself every day. I love that you listen to people with your whole heart, and that you always remember what they have to say. I don't know if I'd prefer to die before you do or not, but I know if I do that you will faithfully pray for my soul every day, and that brings me great comfort.

I am on board with you on the importance of having fun, and a lot of it! If 18 holes of golf is a good thing, then 36 is even better - isn't that true for many things in life? I try never to leave one good party in search of another, and to be among the last people on the dance floor.

Watching your relationship with our mother has taught all of your children lessons in how to truly be a loving spouse - we all try to follow your lead in our own relationships and we're fortunate for having grown up with your marriage as our role model.

There's so much that I could say about how much I love and admire you Daddy - please know that despite the fact that I'm not with you today, you'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

With love and big moose smoochies,
Your Favorite

I Love New York

I love the sights, smells, and action of New York City.

I love jumping on a subway on one end of town and emerging at the other fifteen minutes later to a whole new look and feel of the City.

I love watching my sons eat hot dogs at corner stands four times a day and counting Godiva "chocolixer" drinks as the protein for that day.

I love visiting a fencing club that was established in 1883 and a Mac store that houses the latest in today's really cool technology within one hour of each other.

I love having skinny crust pizza with broccoli on it, a nice Chianti and "the world's best cheesecake" for my birthday dinner.

I love being able to roam around St. Patrick's Cathedral every day of my trip, lighting candles and thanking God for all the blessings in my life.

I love visiting Trump Tower, FAO Schwartz, the big Niketown, and Central Park - walking blocks and blocks amidst the flurry of life here.

I love that we still have two days left - who knows what else we'll see, but I bet I'll love it!

In a New York State of Mind

We're on the road again - we'll be leaving in a few hours to head to New York City for a quick (too quick) trip to an EM conference. We've taken this same trip for the past three years, and always have a wonderful time. We stay at the Marriott Marquis in the heart of Times Square. I hope to find time to blog from the road, but if not I'll be back at my desk Monday.

As someone I know says, "It's good to be a Hendey!"

Watch Out Ebert and Roeper

Over at the new CatholicMom.com Culture Spotlight Blog I have a crack new movie reviewing team: M & M! These two dudes from Bakersfield, ages 8 and 10, have taken up the challenge to view and critique the latest popular flicks and are generously sharing them at my site. So far, they've reviewed Over The Hedge and Cars. I'm quite impressed by their insights! Thanks again to Michael and Matthew - keep up the great work!

A Team of Angels

Thanks to Trisha, who wrote me to share news of her family's trip this summer to bring hope and encouragement to others. Trisha wrote the following poem. For more information on her mission of hope, visit www.teamofangelshelpme.com.

A TEAM OF ANGELS FOR THE OVERWHELMED

I need a team of angels, Lord -
I don't think one will do
Please send me all the help from high
For what I am going through.

Guardians to watch over me
And help my soul to cope
I'll do the best I can to pray
And cherish gifts of faith and hope.

Things that made me smile today...Evening Edition

...watching Eric altar serve at Mass this morning - he looks so angelic up there! Also, what Mom can resist the site of an almost 15 year old in shorts, a tshirt, dark socks and black dress shoes?

...my mother-in-law surprised me after mass today with an early birthday cake (it's later this week, but we'll be traveling and she knew I probably wouldn't get a cake if she didn't do it today! (Inside joke to my mom: guess what I got for my birthday "under there"...)

...the site of Adam sitting in the pool, eating dinner - what's better than simultaneous eating and swimming?

...Blue Man Group on PBS - we flipped on the TV tonight and found them rocking out on PBS. We love the Blue Man Group and are hoping to take the kids to see them when they visit Fresno in November.

...No school tomorrow!!!

This 'n That

A few updates:

My recent article on "Cool Tunes for Catholic Kids" is now running in the new Grapevine Magazine. You can read it online - click on the Spring 2006 link.

Check out the great new recipes from Christine this week - Cheesy Potato Beef Bake (for dinner) and Aloha Quick Bread (for weekend brunch). Thanks to Christine, I'll be adding recipes weekly, and may even start cooking!

I've just posted all of the new columns for this week. Take a look at

Kevin Has a Home by our Adoption Columnist Heidi Hess Saxton

Seeing the World Through Different Eyes by Patrice Fagnant MacArthur

Family Time and Getting Fit! by Jodie Lynn

Teaching Moments - Helping Others

Bartering: A Dynamic Feminine Practice and Emotional RX for Women by Michele Howe

Taking the Plunge into Racks of Swimsuits by Marybeth Hicks

Mornings Are For The Birds by Lisa Barker

Cool Tunes for Catholic Kids

A feature article I recently wrote for Grapevine Magazine is now available online for your reading pleasure. Those of you who know and love my procrastinating ways (i.e. my mom and my sister) may recall that this is the article I was working on while traveling to Chicago - the one that nearly didn't get written due to "technical difficulties". It's fun to see it in print! Go to the Spring 2006 issue to read my article.

Teaching Our Children to Serve

This morning, I will drive my eldest son, the fourteen year old, to his first job orientation. Having already passed the health screening, he will complete paperwork, learn the dress code and rules of his new job, have a tour of the facilities and review the objectives of his new position. Eric's new job, a student volunteer position at our local children's hospital, will have him serving two four hour shifts per week as a liaison in clinical and inpatient areas.

Summer vacation is a time for refreshment and renewal. I'm learning, as the mother of a junior varsity football player, that it's also the time for football practice, and lots of it. When I was growing up, my own parents discouraged summer jobs and encouraged family travel, summer learning and rest and relaxation from the busy school schedule. I hope to follow their lead in this respect, taking advantage of the chance to jump off life's treadmill for a few short months.

Summer also seems like the perfect time to teach my children to look for opportunities to be of service to others. In my community, they abound and are varied and fun. The program Eric will join this summer places teenagers in responsible positions in a respected Children's hospital. Our community also offers volunteer jobs in libraries, churches, schools and even mission trips. Our teens can help families build new homes through Habitat for Humanity or provide life-giving care to animals through our SPCA or zoo. They can teach art to children or serve at the right hand of a physician for a summer of research. The choices seem endless and fascinating.

One of my biggest goals as a mother is to instill in my boys a heart for loving and serving others, so Eric's summer venture seems a means to that end. Along the way, Eric will also learn to show up for work on time, dressed appropriately and with a positive attitude. He will learn to execute his duties professionally and with compassion. He will meet new friends and will likely have fun in the process. Eric will serve in a volunteer capacity, so his pay for this job will be the smiles he receives from the patients with whom he interacts and the warmth in his heart that comes from knowing he is doing the right thing - helping others.

Now I Know How Stars' Wives Feel!

Congratulations to my incredible awesome husband, who last night accepted his hospital's equivalent of the Academy Award!!! Greg works so very hard, while keeping a great perspective on the priority of family, so it was so wonderful to see him recognized for all of his efforts. While he was standing at the podium giving his speech, I wanted to stand up and yell, "Hey, that's my husband!!!", but I restrained myself. My only regret is not having brought the video camera to record the moment for posterity, but I don't think it's one I will soon forget. My pride level could only have been trumped by one other woman in the room - Greg's Mom. What a precious moment to watch your son prosper at his chosen profession, and to know that he is also a Godly and family oriented man - she did a great job raising him!

Each year the School of Medicine at the University of California, San Francisco presents a total of four Kaiser Teaching Awards—three to faculty on main campus (one each to a member of the clinical department, basic science department, and volunteer clinical faculty), and one to a clinical faculty member in Fresno. These awards are extremely prestigious and important to faculty. Winners are presented a certificate and a significant monetary reward at the School of Medicine’s commencement in San Francisco. The Fresno recipient is also recognized for his/her achievement at the UCSF Fresno commencement ceremony.

The Kaiser Award criterion is teaching, not service based, and includes demonstration of teaching skills, motivation of learners, and communication abilities. Faculty and medical residents select the recipient.

What's New?

Hey Y'all! Have you missed me? Life is settling back down to its normal frantic pace after two weeks of celebration and having Nana here for a visit. I love having my mom in my home - it makes me envious of those of you who live close enough for nightly visits with parents and siblings. We're spread all over the country! I promise to post photos soon of some of the past weeks' events, including my son's graduation, which was spectacular.

I've added some new stuff this week over at CatholicMom.com, along with updates of all of our favorite columnists. Take a look at our new Family Dinners feature, featuring Christine's wonderful recipes. This will become a new weekly feature and I think it's going to be great! If you like Christine's recipes, you may want to follow the links on that page to her "Dine Without Whine" service - your subscription earns a small referral fee for CatholicMom.com and will go to help keep the site alive and well.

I've also just posted my latest Book Spotlight interview with Cheryl Dickow, author of Reclaiming Your Christian Self in a Secular World: A Woman’s Worth. Cheryl's book is great, as are her insights in our chat. This new CatholicMom.com Culture Spotlight Blog will be the new blog for book spotlights, musician interviews, featured artists and more. I may even start blogging over there about some of our family's favorite television shows.

For now, I'm off to a staff meeting at Church and then to pick up son #1 from football practice (yes, it's already started!!!). One favor to ask: would you please all join me today in praying for a special intention?

Mom, I miss you already! Can't you just come back - oh, and bring Daddy too! I'm a forty two year old woman with separation anxiety.

Blog Break

Occasionally, real life gets so filled with blessings and fun that I am unable to find my way to the computer for days on end. Anticipating Eric's graduation this weekend and the attendant events and parties, I know I'm going to be too busy to blog. Please join me in praying for all those who graduate this month as they embark on life's many adventures. May their lives be filled with happiness and may the study and work they undertake bring glory to God, who blesses us all so greatly!

Remembering to Ask

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7:7-8

I just did it again – I wasted time and energy stressing out over a problem that could have been resolved easily had I taken the time to ask for help.

My part-time job as parish webmaster for my Church involves keeping our web site updated on a regular basis. Last evening, I received a request from my supervisor that something be placed on the site. In an attempt to be responsive to her request, I made the needed change and went to upload the site to our server. I was met with the equivalent of a computerized door slamming in my face – no upload, no error message, no explanation. I’ve worked on the site long enough to know that something was wrong and needed to be fixed, and that the situation was beyond my capabilities. The smart and efficient move at that point would have been to pause, contact customer service at the hosting company, and wait for their reply. However, in my bullheadedness, I tried several work-around solutions, none of which worked. After putting my sons to bed, I tried again and was again denied access. I went to bed later in the evening, annoyed that I had not completed my supervisor’s request and concerned about the problem, but still without calling customer service. I awoke early this morning, tried again, and was met with the same problem. The third time proved to be a charm – I was frustrated enough to pick up the phone and dial the 800 number. With one call and a fifteen minute delay, the problem was resolved quickly and effectively. The site was updated immediately. Had I called customer service last night, I probably would have gotten a full night’s sleep.

I share this experience because it parallels trials we all sometimes face as parents, and as people. I’m embarrassed to share the number of times I’ve obsessed about a problem before taking time to pause in prayer. I know that quiet time spent in prayer, every day, is a crucial component to my life. I know in my mind that when I’m confronted with a situation seemingly beyond the scope of my own control, my first reaction should be to turn my heart to God. And yet, all too frequently, I charge ahead and try to sort things out for myself. I neglect to ask for divine intervention for the guidance and wisdom I need to choose the correct path. In doing so, I make a difficult situation even worse.

Someone I greatly admire recently shared with me that she asks her children on a regular basis, “What would you like for me to pray for today?” She listens to their replies and takes their intentions with her to her time spent in Adoration. She pauses in the midst of whatever they may be doing and prays right then with the child. She prays the Rosary aloud with or in the company of her children, remembering their special intentions. I borrowed her line this week with one of my boys and was astounded by the list of prayers needed that he shared with me. Why had I waited this long to ask him? I don’t have the answer to that, but I do know that I’ll be asking him regularly from now on, and will also be asking him to pray for me.

Forgetting or neglecting to ask for help can extend beyond our prayer lives. On multiple occasions, I’ve declined an offer of help from a friend when I really could have used it. From opportunities to car pool to offers to babysit, I’ve turned down chances to allow people who love me to help me. “It’s ok,” I share confidently, “I can handle it all myself.” Nine times out of ten, I do handle it all alone. What I remember on that tenth time when I allow myself to ask, or to accept an offer of help, is that there is grace present in both asking for help and in receiving help. If we are always the one who gives to our loved ones, we never allow them to be the givers. If we take great joy in helping others, we should remember that they might too enjoy helping us every once in a while!

As a person and as a mother, I am challenging myself to remember to ask. Both routinely and spontaneously, I need to turn to my Father in heaven, who loves me so greatly, and to ask Him for the grace to live each day to its best and for His ultimate mercy in my life. Next time that server goes down or I’m worried about how to get two children to two separate locations at the same time, I will remind myself that I’m never alone and that I don’t always have to do it all myself.

For Today

Today's Readings

Because of your kindness and your truth,
you have made great above all things
your name and your promise.
When I called, you answered me;
you built up strength within me.
Psalm 138

Today's Saint - St. John Baptist Rossi: Despite suffering from illness himself, St. John worked with all his strength to serve the poor, the ill and the homeless. He was known as a great confessor and sought after for parish missions.

Dear God, I need strength today - strength to know and to do your will. Thank you for the example provided to me by St. John Baptist Rossi, who looked beyond his own difficulties and found the strength and the perseverance to serve those less fortunate. Amen

Counting Backwards

I just dropped Eric at school for the big 8th grade field trip to Magic Mountain. Things have progressed to the stage that most 8th grade parents simply slow the SUV to a crawl while their teenagers jump from the car, anxious to join their buddies. Heaven forbid that a Mom like me actually pull into a parking stall and walk her son to the bus, and don't even think about asking for a hug!

Eric is on the countdown, with five more days left of 8th grade. It's a week that will bring fun memories with special friends. At one of my favorite blogs, Mike St. Pierre's Notebook, Mike has his own take on Counting Backwards, which is what got me started thinking about the whole topic. Mike looks at it from the perspective of good time management and being prepared for what lies ahead. I think that is what Eric's doing this week too - savoring the fun, but anticipating that next leg of his path toward adulthood. Today, his schedule is filled with roller coasters and buddies - just as it should be for an 8th grader! I'm going to try following Mike's advice for Counting Backwards this week to help myself juggle my way through the priorities of a busy week of work and family duties. Counting backwards should help me to find the time to stop and smell the roses that this week is sure to bring!

For Today

Today's Readings

When the Advocate comes whom I will send you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, he will testify to me. And you also testify, because you have been with me from the beginning.

Today's Saint - St. Rita of Cascia: Despite her early wishes to enter the convent, St. Rita followed her parents' will for her and married young. Her husband was an evil man who frequently mistreated her, but St. Rita had the courage of her convictions and continued to pray and to receive the sacraments. After his death and the death of her two sons, she joined the Augustinians and was known for a life of prayer and devotion to Christ.

Lord, help me to seek you everywhere today and to be strengthened by your Advocate, the Holy Spirit. I ask a special prayer today for men and women who are doing their best to raise their children in your Faith by themselves. Please give all parents the strength and courage we need to lead our children to a relationship with you. Amen.

Things that made me smile today...

All before 8:00 -

* Being woken up by an 11 year old with a smile on his face who's trying very hard to be quiet

* Having an educated breakfast table discussion with two boys about a certain movie and why it can be dangerous for those who know nothing about the Bible (it's interesting to hear their opinions)

* Watching a boy play with a stick in the driveway for twenty minutes and realizing he woke himself up early just so he'd have time to do it

* Deciding to not fold laundry and instead heading into the music room and playing a duet of the fiddle tune "Cripple Creek", accompanied by a fourteen year old on electric guitar (who will sit and play fiddle tunes with aging mother even though she's really bad and has to keep starting over)

* Listening to two boys sing "Bohemian Rhapsody" all the way to school at the top of their lungs

* Hugs and kisses in the parking lot from both boys (I think the days for that are numbered!)

If I accomplish nothing else today, it's already been a fabulous day! Thank you God, for the little moments that fill my life and for the blessing of my children, who teach me something new and precious every day.

For Today

Today's Readings

This I command you: love one another.

Today's Saint - St. Ives (Yves), one of the patron saints of lawyers, known for his service to others. From the USCCB web site:

Saint Ives, from a town near Treguier in Brittany, France, a priest, who preserved justice without respect for personages, fostered harmony, defended the causes of orphans, widows, and the poor for the love of Christ and received these same unfortunate ones in his own house.

Father in heaven, help me today to love as Jesus called me to love - let me follow the example of St. Ives and look for ways to better love and serve the poor and needy, especially those most in need of love and compassion. Thank you for the blessings of this day!

Sticking to What We Know Is Right

Everyday, I learn new lessons in parenting and I pray for the strength and guidance to make the right decisions in the loving and leading of my children.

Last night, we were sitting out by the pool (yes, it's already swimming weather here in 97 degree Fresno!) and Eric (son #1, and the one who'd make a great lawyer) said, "Mom, I have three questions for you".

"OK, bring them on!"

Question Number One - "Can I still go the dance at Sacred Heart on Friday night?" (Background - Sacred Heart is a local Catholic school who has invited other junior high students to their end of the year dance. I initially thought it was a great idea, but it is now scheduled for the night before the Catholic high school's big Math test to determine placement in honors classes for next year.)

Mom's Silent Gut Instinct - No way, you're going to be taking a test in the morning that could determine your academic path for the next four years. I want you tucked into bed by 9:00 pm, dreaming of algebraic equations.

Mom's Response - "OK, Eric, you can go but I'm going to be picking you up early, by 9:15 so that you get a good night's sleep before your test."

Question Number Two - "The guys are going to the movies after school on Friday. Can I go?"

Mom's Initial Response - "OK sweetie. Adam's got fencing so I need to work out ride stuff, but it should be ok."

Mom's Secondary Query - "What are you seeing?" (I know, this should have been the very first question, but I was dazed by the heat and temporarily off my game.)

Son's Sheepish Response - "XYZ" (Insert name of controversial blockbuster film opening at theaters this weekend and the source of great public outcry)

Mom's Final Word on Question #2 - "Nope, you're not seeing "XYZ" on Friday. Thanks for asking, and I will consider other movie options, but you're not seeing that movie." (Thankfully we have a long standing rule about seeing PG13 movies that haven't been pre-screened by a parent).

Question #3 - "Are you sure I still can't go see the XYZ (insert name of outrageous punk band) concert in August?" (Apparently, he's in the mood to debate!).

Mom's (Repeated) Response - "Yes, I'm sure you won't be going to that concert." (Delivered calmly, despite the fact that this particularly topic has been discussed numerous times in the past month.) "But thanks for asking again."

Son's Response - "Why?"

Mom's Comeback - "For the same reasons Dad and I gave you last week when we discussed this topic."

Son's Response - "OK. Do we have any bacon?"

Mom's Response - "Yes, I bought some today!!!" (Finally, a question I can answer affirmatively!)

I've come to accept that parenting this particularly child involves a little give and take, and much negotiation. He will follow rules set for him, but feels better about the following when he's participated in a discussion about the thinking behind them and had his say about the fairness of the rule.

This particular child, owing to his temperament, will question his limits. He will test the waters, wanting to tread out into the deeper ones without supervision. He is, by nature, an adventurer. He is on the verge of new horizons, and anxious to run out and explore them. He wants to live life to its fullest, to try new things, and to be the best he can be.

At times like last night's poolside chat, I think about how much easier it would be to be like "everybody else's parents". The ones who drop the kids off at the multiplex theater on the weekend, unsupervised, and pick them up three hours later. The ones who don't have a "bedtime" and allow their kids to talk on the phone or IM as late as they want. The ones who accompany their kids to punk rock concerts because they think it's cool.

The funny thing is, I think most of my son's friends parents are more like me. Who is "everybody else"? Most of my son's peers have the same limits placed on them by parents who share our same moral framework for parenting. I think "everybody else" is a fictional group of kids, used to pressure parents into going against what they know in their heart and soul is right.

I'm pretty sure that my teenage son is convinced that if he just asks me enough times, the water-torture method of wearing me down will result in the response he desires. His problem is that I can be so bull-headed about some things.

I know he's going to keep asking, and keep pushing those limits. I'm still learning about parenting in this new phase of life, still praying every day for the strength and wisdom to help him along life's path.

Current strategy: pray lots, keep making time for our chats, and keep lots of bacon in the house.

For Today

Today's Readings

“As the Father loves me, so I also love you. Remain in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and remain in his love."

Today's Saint - Pope John I; Also celebrating a feast day today is Eric IX of Sweden, considered Patron of Sweden but never formally canonized.

Today in Catholic History

On May 17, 1934 the Ave Maria Grotto at St. Bernard Abbey in Cullman, AL was dedicated. This is on my list of places to visit someday. From the website of the grotto:

The Ave Maria Grotto, known throughout the world as "Jerusalem in Miniature", is a beautifully landscaped, four-acre park designed to provide a natural setting for the 125 miniature reproductions of some of the most famous historic buildings and shrines of the world. The masterpieces of stone and concrete are the lifetime work of Brother Joseph Zoettl, a Benedictine monk of St. Bernard Abbey. Begun as a hobby, with various materials he could find, and infinite patience and a remarkable sense of symmetry and proportion, Brother Joseph re-created some of the greatest edifices of all time.

Thanks Brother Joseph! I hope to see your Ave Maria Grotto some day!

Source: America's Great (and not so great) Catholic Moments by Thomas J. Craughwell

For Today

Today's Readings

If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask for whatever you want and it will be done for you. By this is my Father glorified, that you bear much fruit and become my disciples.

Today's Saint - St. Pascal BaylonOf humble origins, St. Paschal followed his call in life and became a lay brother/doorkeeper for the Franciscan community in the 1500s. He was known for his tremendous devotion to the Blessed Sacrament. He is the patron of shepherds and of Eucharistic congresses.

Heavenly Father, help me to look at my life today and see opportunities to bear fruit for you. Let me see the example of St. Pascal, who in his own simple way, was your light to others in his world. Please help me to recognize that all of my little ways, done in love for you, are my prayer to you. Thank you for the blessings of this day!

Happy Birthday Erin and Evan!!!

Dear Erin and Evan,

I know we've been celebrating all month and that you don't officially share a birthday, but I thought I'd write a note to the two of you together, as that's how I think of you in my heart during the month of May.

I need to take a moment to tell you how much you mean to me and how very much I love you!

The two of you are much alike in many ways - you love to travel, whether it's to the lake, or to Paris. Your smiles and your personalities light up the room! You look really cute in your PJs! You love a clean kitchen, and one of you is an excellent sweeper! Most of all, you are excellent listeners. One of you will pause in the midst of important legal transactions to take a call from a Fresno housewife. The other listens so closely that he repeats the last word of every sentence, so you always know in your heart he's heard what you have to say!

To Erin, you are sister and friend forever. I never cease to be amazed at your energy, your prowess, your intelligence, the depth of your emotions, and the totality with which you share all that you have with those around you.

To Evan, you are my sunshine and you never cease to make me smile. I love how you remember everything that happens, how you put your nativity scene action figures in just the right place when you read your bible. I love how you are so talkative and expressive. I love you because you are the miracle that turned my best friend into a mommy!

To my two favorite redheads, I hope your celebration lasts all month - you deserve all the happiness in the world!

With love and moose smoochies, L.

Putting On A Show!

When we were growing up, my siblings and I loved to put on shows. We would drag the record player into the living room, set my Mom on the Avacado Green couch, and dance around the shag carpeting to the tunes of the Monkees, the Patridge Family or whatever else we had on hand. By my Mom's reaction, you would have thought she was witnessing a Broadway musical. She never said, "That's cute kids, but I need to go check my email..."

We didn't do too many puppet shows, but for those who are puppet show fans, we've got a great new resource at CatholicMom.com! Lisa M. has incredibly shared her scripts for over twenty wonderful Catholic puppet shows. You can find them here in their new home at the Catholic Mom Puppet Show Ministry. I'm picturing rooms full of CCD kids putting on these shows, and also Moms across the country watching them performed in their own homes.

For Today

Today's Readings

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you.
Not as the world gives do I give it to you.
Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid.

Today's Saint - St. Dymphna, patron of those suffering from mental and nervous afflictions; martyred at fifteen and known for her purity of spirit.

Blessed God, we pray today through the intercession of St. Dymphna for all those lives touched by mental illness. Bring healing and comfort to the suffering and strength to their caregivers. Also, for those whose lives are filled with stress and anxiety, let us hold St. Dymphna as a model of strength as we follow her example of purity of heart. Our Lady of Fatima, we pray also for peace in our world. Amen.

A Great Gift for You or Someone Special

Catholic artist and mom Melissa Dayton has made her lovely piece "Escort to God" available in poster format. As a special gift to CatholicMom.com readers, Melissa is offering a incredible 50% off discount on the already very reasonable price ($16.95 normally, less than $8.50 with discount!). This offer is available through the end of May.

To order your own copy of "Escort to God", visit Pearls of Grace Fine Art http://www.pearlsofgracefineart.com/products.asp?pg=2 and select "Poster" under the "Select Size" button. The coupon code for this offer is 752404. A special thank you to Melissa Dayton for this generous sharing of spirit and light.

To read my interview with Melissa and learn more about her incredible work, click here.

For Today

Today's Readings

“Whoever has my commandments and observes them is the one who loves me. Whoever loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and reveal myself to him.”

Today's Saint - St. Isidore, the Farmer

God, through the intercession of St. Isidore, the holy Farmer, grant that we may overcome all feelings of pride. May we always serve You with that humility which pleases You, through his merits and example.
Catholic Online

Happy Mother's Day Mom!

Children, let us love not in word or speech
but in deed and truth.

As I sat in Mass this morning listening to these words from today's second reading, my thoughts turned to my mom, the world's best mother.

Growing up as the oldest of five children, I vastly underappreciated my mother. In fact, until I had my own children, I think I was a bit of a Daddy's girl. But all that changed pretty quickly after I held Eric for the first time.

There's something about taking on the vocation of motherhood that gives you an unimaginable appreciation for and respect of your own mother. My mom was, indeed, the best - and she continues to be to this day! She was a wonderful role model of all a committed and loving wife should be. In good times and in bad, she loved my Daddy with a love that has remained constant and unwavering, and in a way that was evident to each of us. To this day, I love to watch my parents together, especially when they're dancing!

As a mother, she made countless sacrifices to benefit us, but you'd never have known it. Not once did I ever imagine that she might rather be doing something more exciting than endless loads of laundry or finding creative recipes for hamburger. She never complained about driving the way I do - she just did it (and for five of us, as opposed to my two!). Gracefully, and with wit, she raised five of us who went on to full and happy lives. All of her children graduated from college, and all have emulated our parents' loving relationships by finding our own soul mates. We are raising our own children in the faith she so lovingly taught us with the words she instilled in our souls even before we were old enough to say them for ourselves.

As a mother myself, one of my mantras has become "WWMD?" What would mom do? More often then not, when faced with a parenting challenge, she is the first expert I consult. Like today's soccer moms, she carries a cell phone 24/7 to be on call for parenting emergencies that arise. But instead of a sick second grader needing to be picked up, she consults with her grown daughters and sons on everything from potty training to teenage relationships to the recipe for Impossible Pie.

I'm lucky, I have a mom and a best friend all rolled into one. If a day goes by where I'm unable to speak with her by phone, I tuck the memories of that day into my mind to share with her as soon as I can. She loves me enough to tell me straight up when I'm obsessing over something stupid. She marvels with me at my children's accomplishments and helps me to keep their shortcomings in perspective. She comes to my rescue, both physically and emotionally, sometimes even before I can recognize that I need her help.

Like an object lesson for those to whom John spoke in today's epistle, my mom's love is obvious not only in her words, but especially in her deeds and actions. She is the epitome of all I think a mother should be - if I can do 2/5ths of what she does in my life as a mom, I will consider myself a success in life.

Happy Mother's Day Mom! I love you! Thank you for the gift of life and for the love you've showered on us. I love you more than I'll ever be able to say! L.

Rites of Passage

Since Eric was a first grader at St. Anthony's School, I've anticipated the tears I would shed on the day of his 8th grade Balloon Mass.

At our school, like many others, there are wonderful traditions. One of them is the annual Farewell Mass, referred to at our house at the "Balloon Mass".

The tradition goes like this: each fall, shortly after school begins, the 8th graders welcome the new first graders to our school with a special Welcome Mass. At the conclusion of Mass, the 8th graders meet up with their first graders buddies, present them with a balloon, and process hand-in-hand from the sanctuary. First grade mothers, having anticipated for years the day their child would attend this first school mass, tussle for the perfect photo opportunity. The students process to Mary's Garden, where the blue and gold balloons are released.

Each spring, we hold the Farewell Mass outside in Mary's Garden. The 8th graders are the guests of honor. By this point in their academic journey, the first graders have become proficient readers and are responsible for proclaiming the readings, intercessory prayers and special words of care and blessing for the 8th graders. At the end of Mass, each first grader presents a balloon to his or her beloved buddy and the students again process hand in hand out of Mass. The 8th graders then gather together and sing a farewell song. As the blue and gold balloons are released into the heavens, the students exchange hugs and sometimes even a tear or two. Eighth grade moms jockey for position, trying to get the perfect angle without being too embarrassing to their teenagers. Moms juggle the digital camera, the video camera, and the wadded up tissues we've consumed during this sentimental moment.

Today was Eric's special Balloon Mass, the one I've been waiting for since first grade. In the past few years, as I watched other graduating 8th graders participate in the ritual, I've shed a few tears of joy and thanksgiving for being part of such a wonderful community. I always thought that there would be many more tears when I watched my own 8th grader release his balloon. But today, I surprised myself. Yes, I'll admit to a few tears, but mostly I felt proud and extremely happy for Eric. He has had a wonderful time in elementary school. But like that balloon, he's destined for greater journeys.

One day recently, we were all standing in the kitchen and Eric jokingly said to Greg and I, "My confidence is at an all time high." Wow, what a thing to hear from a fourteen year old! I remember, at that age, feeling incredibly unsure of my position in the world. High school, for me, was something to be feared - new territory with many new people to meet and lots of uncertainty. But when I look at Eric, I realize he's ready. He's benefited so greatly from being part of a loving and spirit-filled elementary school community, but like his balloon, he's ready to soar, and now's the time.

The next few weeks will hold more special traditions as the 8th graders slowly march towards graduation. There will be parties, trips, awards ceremonies and more. I'm sure I'll need more tissues along the way as I watch my son move into the next phase of his life. Today, as I watched Eric's balloon grow smaller and smaller in the sky, I said a silent prayer for Eric, and one for Greg and I - that he will enjoy the journey before him and that we will have the strength and grace to help him prepare himself for all that lies ahead.

What Do You Just For You?

I just got home from doing something really fun, just for me! A few years ago, in a quasi mid life crisis moment, I decided I wanted to learn to play the violin. At that time, I was already forty - much too old to consider a future career as a virtuoso, but I took on the challenge. I've always loved fiddle music, so I decided that I'd focus on basic violin with an emphasis on fiddle.

Since that time, various events have conspired against my becoming the next member of the Dixie Chicks. I have been through four teachers (that's a whole new blog entry in itself), breaking up with my last teacher well over a year ago.

Somehow, this week, I decided to pick back up the bow. I haven't played in a very long time, as it always seems like there's something more important or productive I should be doing. We moms tend to do that a lot, with our lives so busy serving other people and working. Playing my violin is something I do just for me...no one else derives any benefit from it, so I've tended to just not do it.

But, the point is, I love playing. I sound really bad (practicing is a great way to get boys to go play outside), but I don't care. I'll probably never get anywhere beyond playing for my own pleasure, but I've decided now that that's reason enough to play.

So today, I had my first lesson with my new teacher. From the first time I met him, I thought he'd be a great teacher - his name is Patrick! I think that's a good omen.
Taking lessons is good for me, as it encourages me to take time to play and practice.

What do you love to do, just for you? Have you done it lately? We can make all the excuses we want, but the truth is that most of us can find an extra thirty minutes somewhere in our days to do something we love: to write, to take a walk, to garden just for the joy of it, to write a letter, to call a girlfriend, or even just to take a bath! I challenge you today to do something you love, just for you!

New Articles

Our Mother's Day celebration is off to a great start over at CatholicMom.com - take a look to view some recent articles, gift ideas, poetry and more. I'm still looking for contest entries so that someone can win Lisa Barker's wonderful book. Remember, your entry can be as brief as one sentence. All names who comment here or email me will be entered.

Share a Story, Win a Book

Hi Friends! Mother's Day is one of my favorite holidays, but not for selfish reasons. In my family growing up, my Daddy always made a HUGE celebration for the world's greatest Mom (and now Nana!) on Mother's Day. We would make my mom breakfast in bed and all five kids would snuggle with her (and probably eat most of her food). It's a precious memory from my childhood.

Jelly Mom columnist and author Lisa Barker has graciously offered to donate one of her fabulous books Just Because Your Kids Drive You Insane Doesn't Mean You Are a Bad Parent! as the prize for a fun contest this week at CatholicMom.com.

To enter, simply submit a special memory related to Mother's Day, a gift idea, a recipe, a tribute to your own Mom, or anything else related to Mother's Day. You can either submit your thoughts as a comment on the Catholic Mom Moments blog, or email them to me at lisa@catholicmom.com -

The names of all who submit will be entered into a drawing and on Monday, May 15 I will randomly select the winner of Lisa's fabulous book. Good luck and enjoy sharing! Lisa

Answers to "What I've Been Up To"!

OK, some of you have figured them out, but here's an extremely brief travelogue of my recent odyssey.

Photo #1 - Las Vegas (no, not the real Venice!) - We spent a few days at the new Wynn Hotel in Vegas, living in the lap of luxury

Photo #2 - Yosemite - We are fortunate enough to live with waterfalls practically in our backyard. This photo was taken on a day when Eric and I discovered a new and fairly hidden hiking trail about 50 minutes from our front door. The majesty of the waterfalls this year is indescribable - God's creation leaves me speechless at times like this. It was an incredible day, with two incredible boys! (Mom shared a few "stay away from the ledge" nags during the course of this otherwise lovely hike).

Photo #3 - The Walnut Room, Marshall Fields, Chicago - Nana and I surprised Erin for her 40th birthday (ok, so we were a few days early....). We both flew to Chicago and we really did fake my little sister out! It was a wonderful trip. If you've never been to Chicago in the spring, plan a visit - the weather is lovely and the tulips are awash in color. More on the suprise and my slightly aging sister soon.

Photo #4 - Notre Dame!!! Ok, this one should have been simple. I attended this year's Alumni Senate in the shadow of the dome. I felt like an elderly alumna when I asked two young coeds to take my picture in front of the dome! I hope to share more on this fantastic conference soon.

I think I'm home now for a while and ready to get caught up and back on track. I was greeted at the airport by two handsome young men bearing a spring bouquet and one slightly bedraggled husband who'd been minding the store in my absence! It's wonderful to travel, but there's no place like home!!!

Meet Sharmane!

I've just posted my new interview with an incredibly talented Catholic Mom, Sharmane Adams, over at the new "blog" for CatholicMom.com dealing with music, books and more. Read my interview with Sharmane and feel free to comment on her great music with this new format. I love Sharmane's latest CD, and know you will too!

Great New Columns

Just posted over this morning at CatholicMom.com! Check them out!

The Mother is the Heart of the Domestic Church by Donna–Marie Cooper O’Boyle

Teaching Moments - 24 Gold Coins in a Day

Top Ten Dental Health Mistakes Of Women Over 35 by Michele Howe

Oversize Emoting Not a Tiny Problem by Marybeth Hicks

A Lesson about Courage by Susan Handle Terbay

Trying to Determine "Needs" vs. "Wants" by Patrice Fagnant-MacArthur

What Can I Say? by Heidi Hess Saxton

The Great And Naked Houdini & His Assistant by Lisa Barker

A Boy, A Man, A Mom by Pat Gohn


Enjoy!!!

What I've Been Up To!

Hey guys! I'm breaking my own personal rule about posting pictures of myself to give you some sense of why I've been so delinquent in my blogging for the past two weeks. Here are some scenes from my recent activities. Can you name the places?









I'll post the correct answers tomorrow.

Missing In Action

For those checking in here who are concerned that I've fallen into a black hole, don't worry! I don't have time for a complete update, but I'm alive and well and just too busy to blog! Since Easter Sunday, I've been on a whirlwind travel schedule - I plan to log on Wednesday, when I will finally be back home, and offer a complete update on all of my recent activities. I've been suffering from an intermittent internet connnection in the various places I've been of late, which is perhaps a good thing! Some time to refresh and revitalize is always a good thing.

Signing off for now...see you Wednesday!
Lisa